Friday, June 20, 2008

Stuff Doctors Like #3:

Although the love of healing patients is foremost in a doctor's heart, that love only slightly supersedes a doctor's love for devices. In a unified package, devices deliver significant good but require significant skill like the art and science of medicine, which involves knowing how and when and why to use the device. When properly used, devices such as the electrocardiogram, pager, and pulse-oximeter impart delight into doctors' hearts everywhere. Devices which become faster, smaller, and more capable noticeably improve the quality of life for doctors, adding just a little bit more spice to patient encounters. Some say that a physical exam and focused history should be sufficient for proper doctor care, but doctors widely agree that devices significantly improve the speed and efficiency and joy of fulfilling the responsibilities as a doctor.

One of the devices fundamental to efficiency in modern medicine is the pager. Some doctors say that they hate their pagers. Do not believe this lie! Deep down inside, the pager tells doctors that they are wanted, needed, even yearned for. Feeling the soft buzz of a hospital pager likely excites the same reward-center of the brain as during suckling and oxytocin-induced milk ejection. The pager is a technological marvel for bringing doctors the sensation of being needed like a nursing mother on an instantaneous basis: even in the dead of night and asleep in a comfortable bed, the doctor will arise and dutifully provide life-healing sustenance for the patient. If one hears a doctor complain of their pager, it is a good move to say, "All things considered, the one benefit to your pager is that you know you are deeply needed by someone, and you know that are the only one to provide relief." Doctors know the truth in that, and you will be sure to earn favor with them because of this kind encouragement.

(Image from The Doctor Is In via Flickr)

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